And before you know it, you’ve talked yourself into something you’re not too proud of, but what the hay. A week later you open the local paper. Your destitute attorney won a major lawsuit, and he’s getting ten percent of a very nice six figure settlement. Meanwhile, you’re still waiting to get paid. Life is not fair….

Now, as the personal coach told you: in the face of adversity, some get bitter and some get better.  You’re gonna get better for sure. But how? How do you avoid getting ripped off by undercutting colleagues and clients that make Mr. Scrooge look like a philanthropist?

Here’s what you do: first you take a step back to analyze the situation. Come one…. pour yourself a nice glass of grape juice and read my latest article… It will only take you a few moments, and by the time you’re finished, you’ll know all about the research Antonio Rangel did that answers the eternal question: does an expensive bottle of Bordeaux taste better because of the price tag?

Cheers!

Paul Strikwerda ©2009

www.nethervoice.com

If you are one of my regular readers, I’m sure you have noticed a shift in the past couple of months. Since I started my company Nethervoice, I have turned my Double Dutch Blog into an extension of my website. So, instead of having one platform in the blogosphere, I now have two: one at  VoiceOver Casting and one on my own site. I guess that’s part of  the “Double” in Double Dutch. VoiceOver Casting has been a great launch pad for me, and it will still be a place where I feel among friends. So, don’t worry… this is no goodbye!

However, in terms of branding, I think it’s important to have a clearly defined, single identity for Nethervoice. Much to my surprise, my blog has become an integral part of that identity. Since the start of my new site in July, thousands of new readers have found me, and that number is growing by the day. I have found a renewed passion for writing, and the journalist in me discovered opportunities to stir the pot of  all that’s cooking in the voice-over world. And if it’s up to me, I will continue to rock the boat every now and then… with your help, of course. This site is only as strong and relevant as our connections.

COMMUNITY

I firmly believe that a sense of community is more vital than ever. When the economy is doing well and there are plenty of opportunities, it’s easier to be more or less self-reliant.  But when the going gets tough, and when there are more talents and there’s less work than ever before, the pressure is on.

Let’s be honest. The voice-over market is pretty much saturated at this moment. You don’t need a degree in economics to realize that a greater supply in a weakened market can only mean one thing: tumbling prices.

The best way to speed this process up, is to have suppliers engage in a furious bidding war. Darwin would have named it: “Survival of the Cheapest”. Isn’t that exactly what is happening? And if you don’t believe me, why is it so hard to buy products that are not “made in China”? Before we know it, all of us will be replaced by speech synthesis technology. It’s almost as good as the real thing and I bet it’s a lot cheaper.

STRAIGHT TALK

A week or so ago, I had a long conversation with one of the people at a voice-over website that shall remain unnamed. I asked him why they were still posting $50 jobs on their site. He gave me two reasons:

1. It’s a free market; it’s not up to my site to set or uphold minimum rates
2. As long as there are people who are willing to do these jobs for $50, this site will post them. He then added: “Believe me, there are plenty of people willing to do these jobs for fifty dollars.”

Now, I could just filter these low-budget jobs out. End of discussion. But that does not solve the fundamental flaws in the system. If we leave things to market forces, we will end up with a “survival of the cheapest”, and in many respects, we’re already there.

The market has no morals. The market does not care about what is fair and reasonable. That’s precisely how and why we ended up in this economic crisis. And that’s exactly why there’s such a thing as a minimum wage (which is not even enough to sustain a family), and why governments all over the globe are proposing and imposing new rules, regulations and oversight.

I have a feeling that a lot of these low-budget jobs are snatched up by amateurs. Now, I don’t mind losing a job to a talented amateur. I do mind losing a job to an amateur charging 20% of my minimum rate, because for this person “it’s just a hobby”. Their voice-over work doesn’t need to pay for the mortgage, health insurance, college tuition, pension plans, car payments, groceries and so on and so forth. And by the way: most of these things have gone up while our rates are steadily going down.

STANDARDS

Any organized profession that takes itself seriously has minimum standards, it offers continued education, it does research to further the field and stands up for its members to make sure that they get paid a fair wage. What makes our line of work so different? Is it because so many of us aren’t unionized or otherwise organized?

Perhaps the instrumental word is “organized”. The question is: are we just a bunch of freelancing, every man and woman for him- or herself, and may the best win-group of people? In that case we are throwing ourselves into the hands of the lowest common denominator, as voice-seekers watch us fight over a $50 dollar bone. I think we could and should do much better than that. We haven’t gone to the dogs yet, or have we?

DOOM & GLOOM

Well, if you’re looking something a bit more lighthearted,  my latest blog might just do the trick… And if you happen to be a Cyril Ritchard, Peter Cook or Steve Martin fan, you’re especially in for a treat. A Dutch treat! What else did you expect?

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The icing on the cake was the release of my fourth audio book “Trial of the Mystic”. It’s a medieval mystery novel, set in a dark and devious monastery. It doesn’t get much better than that! Truth be told, not every week is like this… but I’m sure you know what that’s like. If it rains it pours. Some projects were a long time in the making.

Meanwhile, I discovered a wonderful way to use and promote my voice-over skills to a live audience.  It fell into my lap, a few weeks ago, and I highly recommend you give it a try… continue

The second thing I’d like to share with you, is my frustration with the overall quality of voice-talent on some Pay-to-Play sites. I hate beating a dead horse, but some things simply need to be said. And instead of whining about it, I believe I came up with a few unusual solutions to persistent problems. But let me warn you ahead of time. You might not like my ideas. But if we’d all agree, life would be quite boring, wouldn’t it? So, it’s time we talk about the amateurs pretending to be voice-over pros, and in particular about this question… continue

Ideally, this is what I would like you to do: take a critical look at your current website and be brutally honest. If this were a shop, would you come in and stay for a while? More importantly: would you buy after browsing? And last but not least: would you come back for more?

I have looked at quite a few voice-over websites in the past couple of weeks, and you know by now that I wasn’t exactly impressed. Sometimes it felt like I was walking into the reading room of a library. A few of you felt inclined to respond to my comments and told me that they have no idea and no skills to turn their site into something special. Here’s the good news: you don’t have to be a brilliant professional website designer to bring some color to your online emporium. Once you make the big bucks, I would definitely go to a pro, but when I decided to create a new site dedicated to my voice-over work, I wanted to see what I could do on a very modest budget.

My site is by no means perfect and I’d be the first one to point that out. However, when I type the words “Dutch voice-over” into Google or Yahoo, I am very pleased with what I see!

And for all of you who are wondering how to kick your site up a notch, you should really check out… (continue)

My question to you is this: if you happen to have a personal website and you’re not getting any traffic, what’s the point? Give the money you send your Internet Service Provider to a worthy cause. That way, at least somebody’s benefiting from it.

On the other hand, if you’d like to know what you can do to boost the number of visitors to your corner of the Web, I invite you to read on

David and Stephanie Ciccarelli, the team behind Voices.com, gave me a behind-the-scenes look at where your submissions land, once they’re in cyberspace. In addition, a former casting agent gives his side of the story… You won’t believe what is going on with these “Mad Men” of the advertising industry!

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But here’s the thing: at the end of the day, I wouldn’t want it any other way. I’m getting kind-of spoiled working for this boss of mine. He can be quite demanding and perfectionistic, but he’s a cool guy and some say he has a lot of potential…

During the past couple of weeks, I have been looking outside of my (soundproof) box, and I read up on things like web analytics, conversion management and interception rates. That doesn’t make me an expert, but at least I know where to go for info. In the process I was forced to take a good look at past audition submissions, and if you’ve been reading my recent blogs, you know that I wasn’t exactly impressed by what I discovered. Luckily, I found out that I was not alone. My ponderings struck an alarming chord.

In a few days, readership of this blog skyrocketed to unprecedented heights, and colleagues and pay-to-play site owners alike, contacted me personally. Of course this hype will be over in a few days, but I’ll take it as long as it lasts. To quote Jim Dale on the show ‘Pushing Daisies’: “The facts are these”… it looked like three quarters of all my custom demos had ended in a place called nowhere, simply because the voice-seeker had never bothered to award the job to someone. Is that what I was paying my subscription fees for? Or was this only part of the story?

The investigative journalist in me decided it was time to explore the issue further. One of the first things I did was look outside of my profession for some answers. That’s what lead me to a man named John. You should know that John hasn’t exactly had an easy time during this economic recession.  It was all due to his profession…

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I remember when I first joined a few of these sites. In the beginning, every new job posting seemed to open an exciting window of possibilities. I attacked my auditions with vigor. Every single demo had to be spot-on. Every letter to a job seeker was unique. And when I finally released my masterpiece into the universe, my adrenaline was pumping and my hopes were high. I paid to play, and boy did I play!

A few days into my membership, it happened: I hit the jackpot!! My very first booking was right up my alley: an audio book. I was so excited, I was glowing in the dark! This project was followed by another one, and another one… it was almost addictive. Soon -I told myself- I would join the ranks of the high rollers….

A few months into my subscription, the universe intervened. The gods of voice-over roulette decided it was time to bring me down to earth and pop my beloved bubble. It was early in the morning and the neighborhood was still asleep. I had…

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I can tell you this much: it’s not only about acting skills or about having amazing vocal cords. The buzz word is “branding“. Personal branding, and Harlan Hogan has mastered that art like no one else in our  line of work.

This special edition of Double Dutch is about Harlan Hogan, and about the things we can learn from him when it comes to building a solid reputation.

Harlan is also about to launch two new products that I know you’re going to be interested in. It’s a first for me and a first for you. Read about it in DOUBLE DUTCH

“My condenser has phantom power”, says the guy with the spooky voice.

“My shotgun produces killer demos”, retorts the man in black.

“My ribbon has a suspended diaphragm”, snaps the girl in the Hogan baseball cap.

Waitress: “Anyone ordered a Blue Bottle?”

Unidentified customer: “No, I just got a Snowball.”

“Can I get some MixCubes on the side, please?”

Waitress: “Active or Passive?”

Hearing voice-overs talk is like listening to a Monty Python skit. It can be slightly surreal and silly. One thing’s for sure: many VO’s have opinions. Strong opinions, especially when it comes to gear. Whenever people take themselves too seriously, I’d like to tickle them a little. If you ever plan on messing with the mind of a VO-pro, go to an online voice-over group and type in the following words:

“Hello. I am new to this business and I would appreciate your advice. What’s the best voice-over mic?”

Unknowingly, you just released the beast. If you honestly believe that the Yankees-Red Sox rivalry is a big deal, wait until you get voice-overs started on their choice of mics…. You’ll soon discover that some VO-Pros suffer from a condition the psychological community calls “Microphone Envy”. So far, there is no sound treatment for this auditory affliction.

Here are some of the comments these hired voices might make about their precious sound catchers (in order to protect their identity, I decided to name all of them ‘Mike’).

Gear Geek-Mike: “My mic has a 32 mm gold sputtered thin Mylar capsule.”
Show-off Mike: “Mine has a retail value of $7,775. I got it for 7 grand on Ebay.”
Frugal Mike: “My cheap Chinese mic sounds almost like your pricey German one.”
Model Mike: “But I cut a deal with the Germans to endorse this microphone”
Macho-Mike: “Mine is bigger and better.”

If you happen to be in the market for a microphone, these message boards might not be the best place to solicit advice. In fact, I highly recommend not asking anyone for any recommendations. Period. Not online. Not in the shop. Trust me, you’ll sleep much better. Do your own homework instead.

Researching mics can be good fun. Why not fire up your laptop on a rainy Sunday afternoon, and listen to a few microphone tests. The fellows on this page always manage to crack me up… They’ll say something like this:
nethervoice-mic-test

(test: courtesy of Nethervoice Test Laboratory)

If this type of shootout still leaves you in the dark, try taking the blindfold test. The authors even provide a pfd form to make notes as you listen. I’m not sure how to do that while being blindfolded, so let me know how it goes.

OK, time to take the eyecover off and visit www.howaudio.com. Sound engineer Jeff Dykhouse (no doubt of Dutch descent), posted “Getting good Sound for Voiceover”, a 20-minute microphone throwdown, featuring the Neumann U87, Sennheiser ME66 Shotgun, Sennheiser 421, Rode Podcaster and the MXL UBS .009. It’s actually quite informative, and you can brush up on your Bible studies at the same time!

To end this audio tour, I invite you to visit the online microphone museum, the brain child of retired Professor S.O. Coutant. I’m especially fond of the gallery of “celebrities with various microphones”.

And finally, many of you have asked me what microphone I use to bring home the bacon, which is not an easy thing for a vegetarian…. Well, here’s my pride and joy: the Avantone CK-6 Large Capsule Cardioid FET Condenser Microphone. As you can see, it comes with a custom retro shock mount, an elegantly padded genuine wooden mic box and a padded aluminum storage/travel case.

If you experience a sudden attack of “Microphone Envy”, remember this: writing about microphones is like ice skating about food. It doesn’t really make sense. Just as you can’t get wet from the word water, you don’t know if a certain microphone is the one that will flatter your voice the most by merely reading about it or by staring at a picture. You’ve got to use your ears.

So, have you heard the one about the two voice-overs in a bar?

With tears in his eyes, the first one exclaims: “Why did Don LaFontaine have to go before his time? It is so unfair.” The other one thought about it for a moment, took a deep but silent voice-over breath and replied: “I guess God wanted his voice back!”

Paul Strikwerda

www.nethervoice.com